Virgins: not just for sacrifice


Left: “Did you hear, she had sex.” Right: “Did you hear, she hasn’t had sex.”

Historically speaking, an individual classified as a virgin was often revered, as well as ceremoniously killed to appease various otherworldly beings.

Virgins in the modern age are fortunately in far less danger of being shoved into volcanoes or unearthly monsters’ mouths. However, they do run great risk of venturing into awkward conversations regarding sexual history.

It is normal that one of lesser sexual experience may find themselves uncomfortable when a conversation veers toward the bedroom, and it is natural to feel the urge to retreat to your phone, or the bathroom or literally anywhere that is not here.

You may be less alone than you think.

Contrary to media portrayals and Yik Yak, the National College Health Survey estimates about 30 percent of college students report as having abstained from sexual activity for at least the last 12 months.

However, the fact remains that the label of “virgin” is wrought with connotations both positive and negative. A large majority of people feel as if there is a stigma regarding one’s sexual history. Just like any other label, it is really up to the individual whether to accept or reject the definition as an integral part of their identity.

And, in all honesty, as long as one is exercising appropriate caution regarding birth control and STI’s, one’s decision on what to do regarding their body, shockingly enough, truly belongs exclusively to them.

The specific details or number of your bedroom buddies is information that nobody else has claim to.

Except your doctor. Don’t lie to your doctor.

This brings us back to the other side of the awkward coin when it comes to discussing sex in a social setting. There is just as much potential for discomfort when discussing activities one has actually done.

People are naturally curious and have a tendency to be concerned with others’ intimate statistics: the who, how, when and how many.

And while curiosity is understandable to a degree, I would categorize any judgments passed based on this matter to fall under the highly scientific category of “None of Their Dang Business.”

Additionally, it is important to note that, even between partners, there is a level of personal agency for both parties not to be imposed upon. For example, sexual intimacy doesn’t imply obligation.

Just because you have seen me naked doesn’t mean that I have any more obligation toward you than I do toward, say, a houseplant. You know who else has seen me naked? All of the doctors in the hospital room where I was born. Do I have to text them back? I don’t think so.

Overall, when dealing with the issues of social attitude toward sexual activity, just remember: There are places in life where it is important to wear pants. Class. Court hearings. High-friction waterslides. Outside of these, it doesn’t matter to anyone except yourself where or with whom you decide to go commando.