Album review: ‘Certified Lover Boy’ by Drake

Drake’s new album falls flat, complete waste of time

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COURTESY OF DRAKE

While some of the songs on this album were recommendable, the album as a whole is hard to get through.

COLE QUINN, Evergreen Sports Photographer

One of the worst hip hop artists of today is Aubrey Drake Graham, better known as Drake. While his earlier work showed some promise, he soon fell off the face of the Earth after releasing boring album after boring album. 

When I heard about his new album coming out around the same time as “Donda,” I was actually very curious. Maybe Drake’s new record would be better than his sell-out projects. After being a bit disappointed with some of the tracks on “Donda,” maybe Drake could outshine West’s new record.

When I started listening to the first track on Drake’s album, “Champagne Poetry,” I found the track to be only adequate. The track works as an intro to the album, but it is not exhilerating. 

For a brief moment, I felt as if Drake might actually be trying to create something a bit different from his other work. The Beatles sample adds a nice vintage touch to the track, and Drake’s rapping is on point as well. If all of the following tracks were like this, I would’ve been willing to give this a decently positive review.

“Yebba’s Heartbreak” is also a relaxing interlude. The angelic singing of Yebba, a featured artist on the album, coupled with the soft movements of the piano in the background, puts the listener at ease. The track “You Only Live Twice” also impressed me. The old school hip-hop beat sounds incredibly catchy, and the flows of Drake, Rick Ross and Lil Wayne on the track were also very smooth and intricate.

Those are the only positive things I can say about this album.

There is nothing special about the rest of this album. All of the other tracks, one after the other, are just the same formula. Every track contains percussion and samples from old music, either pitched up or down. Drake only raps about himself, women and money in the other tracks. I could enjoy the sound of throwing a vacuum cleaner out of a twenty 20-story apartment window more than most of the tracks on the album.

The track “Girls Want Girls” single handedly has the worst lyric I have heard in a long time. 

“Yeah, say that you a lesbian, girl, me too”

I honestly don’t even need to elaborate on this lyric. Its stupidity speaks for itself.

Drake’s mumbling on tracks like “In the Bible,” “TSU,” and “Way 2 Sexy” sounds like he decided to lay in his bed and record vocals while trying to fall asleep. Auto tune is also used frequently throughout the album. The amount of auto tune is so much that it sucks the character out of Drake’s voice and makes him sound way too artificial. 

One particular track that I despise is “Way 2 Sexy.” Anyone who thinks sampling Right Said Fred’s “I’m Too Sexy” for a rap song should be sent to a psychiatrist. Half of the song is just the word “sexy,” overused to the point where the word loses its meaning. Drake also brought Future and Young Thug onto the track, if the song wasn’t annoying enough. 

By far the worst track on the album is “Knife Talk.” Drake tries so hard to paint himself as a person who is not to be messed with. He fails and falls so flat on his face. Project Pat and 21 Savage, other artists featured, do not come off as aggressive in this track. Instead, they sound bored and uninterested. 21 Savage raps the repetitive chorus of the song as if he is recording his audio while trying not to wake up his parents.

Hip-hop and rap are genres that emphasize storytelling. Some of the best rap albums can be deciphered to the point where a listener could write an entire essay. Drake, seemingly, doesn’t care about the art of hip-hop, he only sees it as a tool to make money. This album is bad enough in the first half-an-hour. Listening to the entire hour and a half of material on this album was a complete waste of my time.

Score: 3.2/10