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The sad and brutal reality behind sweater weather

While we enjoy our cozy clothes, our wallets are starving

NICK SANDIFER | Evergreen Cartoonist

NICK SANDIFER | Evergreen Cartoonist

LAUREN ELLENBECKER, Evergreen columnist

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Sweater weather has finally made its appearance in Pullman, but with this delightful fashion trend comes grave consequences.

There is no sweater discrimination in this area, which makes those residing on or outside of campus more susceptible to catching Sweater Fever. This fever is easily transmitted no matter what its material is, be it sheep wool, cashmere, cotton, linen, alpaca wool or what have you.

This also applies to various sweater styles, such as the Suburban Mom, the Angsty ’90s Teen, the Ironically Ugly, the Instagram model and even the simplest thrift store findings.

Sweater-lovers may be wondering what is so terrible about this situation. The answer can be found in the lack of willpower people have when trying to resist the urge to buy various sweaters. This is what turns this fashion trend into a wretched one.

Sweaters aren’t to blame when it comes to a person’s weakness, but it doesn’t help that there are constant reminders of this style everywhere they look. Therefore, this increases an individual’s urge to impulse-buy.

When scrolling through social media during the fall season, it is impossible to save yourself from being exposed to the sweater feed.  You’re bound to come across a picture of someone in a pumpkin patch or apple orchard with an adorable sweater on, and this makes you crave that moment.

Soon, day dreaming becomes a common occurrence. You picture yourself on a cold evening with a cup of tea, a book and an adorable sweater. Reality hits you and you’re left with a brilliant idea: acquire a sweater because this is the only thing that will truly comfort you.

As you’re glancing at the sweater-feed on your social media account, you start considering the outfitters where you can purchase a sweater. Perhaps even two. Next, you take initiative and start scrolling through your options as your history paper begins to feel neglected.

When you finally have your beloved sweaters in your digital shopping cart, you begin to enter your credit card info, but before clicking “finished” something happens. Your past, present and future flashes before your eyes and you begin to contemplate whether or not this is a wise decision.

Will the $64.99 worth of sweaters kill your chances of buying food the rest of the week, or will it restrict you from purchasing the required reading in one of your future classes? These conflicting feelings may fill you with dread, and make you physically sweat about the sweaters you desire.

As you glance between your homework, social media and shopping cart, you start to panic and delete all of the tabs. Once you realize what you have done, you have wasted an hour guilt shopping and you deleted your unsaved project for your class.

The obligation people think they have to fill their wardrobe with sweaters is reaching a dangerous level, which is even more alarming to their bank accounts. However, there are a few ways to avoid emptying your life savings.

Although, it would be ideal to avoid spending money on unneeded things, it is unhealthy to never treat yo’ self.

In order to satisfy your addiction, you could go to a thrift store to find sweaters, or visit your friend and take some of theirs on your way out. Either way you’re losing something, be it money or companionship.

Hide your eyeballs and your wallet because Sweater Fever is rampant in Pullman and who knows how much money, or how many friends you’ll lose because of it.

Lauren Ellenbecker is a sophomore studying communication from Anchorage, Alaska. She can be contacted at [email protected]

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