Fantasy leagues are usually an eclectic group of people, with no league being the exact same. You may be in a league with people from work, buddies from high school, random people you met online, or even you family members. However there are certain types of fantasy owners that can be found in almost every league.

The Complainer

Every hero must have a villain and every fantasy commissioner must have “The Complainer.” This owner takes every opportunity to ridicule the decisions of the commissioner. From topics such as the league website to waivers, this person will complain without prejudice. Of course these issues are never brought up in pre-season, only after the year has started. They preach love for fantasy football but secretly want to ensure that it is played “their way.” In some drastic cases they may threaten to never play in the league again or in more extreme situations, possibly quit.

The Self-Loathing Drafter

Usually after the draft most owners feel pretty confident with the way that their team turned out. This is not the case for “The Self-Loathing Drafter.” Every guy they wanted was taken or simply the draft didn’t turn in their favor. A couple weeks into the season this owner will attempt to trade away what few studs they have for a collection of mediocre players in an attempt to salvage their season. Spoiler alert, it doesn’t work out that well.

The Addict

Almost every league has their version of “The Addict.” The amount of mock drafting this guy does seems insane to most but nothing can quench his thirst for fantasy football. They will chug energy drinks late at night in order to stay up and analyze all the data possible. His/her trade proposals consist of paragraph long summaries on why you should take the deal. If he/she is in school, their grades will suffer, but they don’t care. The fantasy addicts are always members of multiple leagues with various formats and buy-ins. No one understands his passion for the game, or why it is all he can talk about. In the event of him winning the league the other members use it as an excuse, because “it’s all he cares about.”

The Beggar

The invention of text messaging has provided fantasy leagues with a whole new type of animal, “The Beggar.” This owner will use text messaging as a way to beg for fantasy players without the humiliation of doing it in person. The repeated incorporation of the word ‘please’ is this owner’s biggest weapon. They may not have always been this way, but maybe all their running backs got hurt, and thus the beggar was born. More often than not, he tends to be prone to anger when his mass pleas for mercy are not heard, making it that much more hilarious.

The Anomaly

Who is this guy, how is he/she beating me, their team is not the best, and they just got lucky. These are all terms associated with having an owner whose fantasy success defies logic, and thus is an anomaly. Their team is defined as “decent” or “alright” but definitely nothing special. Often times this is one of the newest league members and they just seem to barely scrape by in their weekly matchups. The anomaly is a source of weekly frustration and no one likes playing him for fear of losing to his extreme amounts of luck. A loss to this person can never be justified and is usually embarrassing.

The Home Town Clown

Loyalty for your favorite or home football team is all well and good. However fantasy football is not the place to fly your team’s flag. “The Home Town Clown” will stack up multiple players from their favorite team without any statistical justification. In some cases they will draft their team’s defense in the sixth round when they could have picked them in the 10th, or maybe pick their team’s sub-average second string receiver when he may have gone undrafted. This owner will refuse to admit their mistakes and most always continue to roster these players despite poor performances. In some cases they will sit their stud players if they are facing their favorite team out of “loyalty.”

The Dark Horse

They haven’t made the playoffs in years but somehow out of nowhere they finally do, and makes sure everyone knows it. The Dark Horse’s team isn’t that great and is usually considered an easy win at the beginning of the season, but then proceeds to gain the final playoff seed. This is usually achieved by some dramatic mid-season come back from a poor start. No one wants to lose to a guy who is in their first playoff appearance but it always seems to happen.

Mr. Next Year

They had several good back-to-back seasons but always seem to fall short. “Mr. Next Year” does a fairly large amount of pre-season analysis and mock drafting. However this research and preparation seems to increase every year, making an early exit from the playoffs much more unbearable. If you ask them they will tell you exactly why they didn’t beat you in the playoffs or why their team wasn’t better. Such explanations like “My entire team didn’t come to play” or “I would have won if I started (insert some random bench player)” are quite common. Once their season ends they will only care about next year, and the cycle comes full circle.

The Impossible Trade Partner

Maybe they have been scorned by trades in the past, or perhaps don’t see value in a fantasy perspective. “The Impossible Trade Partner” will spurn every advance you make towards any of their players. They always “have a feeling” their player is going to have a big year, and often has very little evidence to support this claim. You could offer them a very good deal and they will always want more than their player is worth. Sometimes the logic they use is more about spite than anything, they employ classic lines like “If I trade with you then your team will be better than mine,” or possibly “the last time we traded you got the better deal.” Do not be fooled, if they come to you with an offer that is most likely laughable.