Ask Abby: Recovering from Heartbreak

The Daily Evergreen’s sex and relationship columnist, Abby Student, shares some ideas on how to recover from a break up.

Have a question you want Abby to answer? Email [email protected]. All questions will remain anonymous.

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Dear hurrying to happiness,

First off, I’m genuinely sorry for your break up, but I’m a little torn here because, honestly, the only thing that can help you get over someone is time in conjunction with meeting new people. That’s the only thing that can give you the necessary perspective to be where you want to be and get over a person. But in the meantime, short term fixes I’m going to first say the obvious: exercise. Not for self improvement reasons though. Do it to get through that emotional release you need to when you can’t talk to anyone, because there will be downtime where you’re alone and you want to cry, sometimes physically exhausting yourself can get rid of that feeling. Other than dealing with immediate things, things like varying your routine can be really helpful. When you lose somebody who was a part of your regular routine, often times that loss, if your routine remains stagnant or the same as what it was is very apparent. If you throw in some other things to keep yourself busy, not that you can distract yourself from missing somebody, but that obvious lack of being there won’t be present. The third thing I’m going to advise is over all in your mindset is to view it as not a winner/loser. If he dumped you, that does not make you the loser, or that he is better than you. What it means is that you can both be winners down the line. You can both be winners because you’ll meet somebody better suited to your needs than you were for each other. That might be hard to hear right now, but I know you’ll find someone that can make you happy, or you can be happy alone. Not saying that you will be happy alone. I wish you the best of luck in your healing process. Good luck!