The Philadelphia Eagles are facing allegations of rigging the Super Bowl after a review of select plays.
While not noticed by most at the time, the NFL Compliance Department released a statement that said, in part, a large number of irregularities took place during the game last Sunday.
“At around seven minutes into the first quarter, DeAndre Hopkins intercepted the ball from the Eagles. He did not notice at the time the ball had a lit fuse attached to it,” NFL Compliance Director Nick Macri said. “As we all saw, the ball turned out to be a bomb, which exploded. When the smoke cleared, we could clearly see Hopkins was now all crispy, black and stopped in his tracks mid-run. For those who do not follow football, this is not a normal play.”
Careful reviews of the plays revealed several other irregularities. Around six minutes into the second quarter, about seven players for the Chiefs tackled what they thought was Eagles running back Saquon Barkley. It turned out to be halftime performer Kendrick Lamar in disguise. The actual Barkley successfully scored a touchdown while the Chiefs were busy.
By the time of the third quarter, these irregularities only continued. Xavier Worthy got the ball for the Chiefs and ran as fast as he could to the endzone. However, there was no endzone, it was just a wall painted to look like the endzone. He slammed into it, fumbling the ball and allowing the Eagles to receive it.
Worthy had to be peeled off the wall by the on-site medical staff. Worthy was now as flat as a piece of paper and was blown into the air like a kite. The Chiefs intended to allow him to continue playing, but unfortunately, he was sucked into the turbine of a low-flying plane.
The most egregious irregularity took place with only minutes left in the fourth quarter. Travis Kelce received the ball for the Chiefs and nearly made it to the endzone. However, while on his way, Kelce stopped to read a sign that said “Shortcut to the endzone this way” with an arrow pointing to the stadium’s exit.
Kelce followed the sign and left the stadium. As there are no official rules in place for what to do in this scenario, the players waited out the rest of the game for him to return. He did not, and the Eagles won 40-22. Confetti, as well as the shredded paper-like remains of Worthy, rained from the sky during the celebration.
While the Eagles are still considered the winners, there have been calls for a thorough review of the game, possibly leading to their win being considered null-and-void. Some have questioned Lamar’s involvement in the incident in the second quarter, but he has denied any wrongdoings.
“I was looking for the can and I got misdirected onto the field. That’s all that happened. I did not help anyone cheat, I swear,” Lamar said in a post-game press conference. He did not address the giant bag with a dollar sign on it right next to him.
At the moment, the NFL has not launched an official investigation into the game, although they are considering it. However, they have put out a statement asking any members of the public who see Kelce to call their headquarters or his girlfriend Taylor Swift, as he has not returned and is presumed to be still searching for the endzone.
