Any true Disney lover knows there’s an insane number of quizzes out there to tell you what princess you are, what prince you’ll marry, what castle you’ll live in, and who your animal sidekick should be. Yes, I have taken all of these. No shame.

But, I doubt our lovely campus officials have taken these quizzes, so I have taken it upon myself to analyze what Disney movie they would star in.

Mike Leach

Football Head Coach Mike Leach is known to have a love of pirates, he even has a large pirate mannequin in his office. So Leach naturally belongs in “Peter Pan.”

I wouldn’t say he is most like Captain Hook, but I do notice similarities between Leach and Mr. Darling, Wendy’s father.

Mr. Darling comes across as a grouch, but he just wants his kids to get their shit together and stop drawing on his shirts. It seems like Leach is the same way with his football players, expecting them to act like the adults they are.

I had the privilege of meeting Leach when I was editor-in-chief, and to begin with, I was intimidated. However, further into the meeting I realized he is simply passionate. And that is a wonderful quality. And just like Leach, Mr. Darling is simply passionate about the success of his children, he wants them to do well and win at the end of the day.

Kirk Schulz

I see WSU President Kirk Schulz as the Sultan in “Aladdin,” and WSU students are Jasmine. The Sultan, Jasmine’s father, wants her to get married as soon as she is of age, and she’s not very interested in that; I mean, who wants to be forced to do something they don’t want to do?

So, Schulz proposed a student fee to help pay off the athletics deficit. The WSU students, in the place of Jasmine, were being asked to do a stressful task (to our wallets) that wasn’t exactly what we had in mind. We’d rather have fees cut, and Jasmine would rather choose her own man, if she even wants one at all.

Now I have to explain that the Sultan is a beloved character. He is sweet and loving and he wants what’s best for his daughter, just as Schulz wants what’s best for his students. Ultimately, Schulz is here to do what’s best for his Cougar kingdom, just as the Sultan needed to do what was best for his.

Butch T. Cougar

This one is a no-brainer. Butch T. Cougar belongs in “The Lion King.” As the heart of WSU who representing our athletics, Butch is like Simba. We are currently hiding in the jungle of almost amazing seasons sports wide, but we still haven’t fully accepted our rightful place as king of the Pac-12. We’ll get there, Cougs. I believe in you.

Jennifer Ladwig is a senior communication major from Washougal. She can be contacted at [email protected].