Going on a first date can mean a unique set of safety and emotional challenges for college students.

“In general we want to make sure that everyone in the situation is responsible for their behavior,” said Emilie McLarnan, associate director of Alternatives to Violence of the Palouse (ATVP). “Staying safe involves being proactive and figuring an exit plan.”

The first step to protecting yourself is to try to get to know the person as much as possible before meeting, McLarnan said. She suggests checking for red flags in things they say and how they portray themselves. Another option is to ask mutual friends about the person to hear their recommendations.

Nikki Finnestead, violence prevention coordinator at Health & Wellness Services, said during the date, trusting your first instincts is a smart decision.

“Don’t question yourself,” Finnestead said. “Don’t ignore your instincts; instead trust them.”

McLarnan also said an exit strategy is an important component of having a successful date. The date might not be dangerous, but it can create an uncomfortable situation. This can include questions which are outside personal boundaries.

“Texting a certain friend throughout the night or a using a code word to ask them to come and get you is a smart decision” McLarnan said.

Taylor Schwab, general heath coordinator at Health & Wellness, said a safe option for leaving a date is faking a phone call because it diverts the other person’s attention.

“It can be stressful when you barely know this person,” McLarnan said. “Maybe suggest meeting as a group, in a public place or throw a party at your place and invite them.”

McLarnan said going into first dates with decided boundaries is important for safety concerns.

“There are a multitude of boundaries within relationships,” said Victoria Braun, emotional health coordinator at Health & Wellness. “You should think about what you want before you get into a situation and then advocate for yourself.”

Finnestead said it is not just your job to feel safe, but to make sure the other person feels that way as well.

“I think it’s equally important to consider what someone can do to make sure their actions are making the other person feel safe,” Finnestead said. “Respect the other person’s boundaries. Also keep in mind that people can change their minds.”

ATVP has been around since 1980, according to its website. Its mission is to end domestic, sexual and individual violence and victimization in local communities. The organization’s services include “24-hour telephone or in-person crisis intervention; emergency, confidential shelter; legal and medical advocacy; individual and group support; information and referral; and community education.”