OPINION: Satire: A new kind of presidential debate
JOEY FRANKLIN, Evergreen columnist
October 8, 2020
With the disastrous turnout of the first presidential debate on Sept. 29, the next few will be delivered in a different fashion. President Donald Trump and former vice president Joe Biden will be partaking in a gauntlet of activities. With the failure to control the debaters, Chris Wallace will be...
OPINION: Satire: E-sports replace WSU football
JACOB HERSH, Evergreen opinion editor
August 25, 2020
With the recent cancellation of all WSU sports for the semester, the Coug community will be significantly different from past years. No longer will Martin Stadium be filled with cheers or, as was the case last year, groans, as our beloved team screwed up on defense again. It seems as though the Cougars...
OPINION: Satire: Frat parties mask up
JACOB HERSH, Evergreen opinion editor
August 17, 2020
Hard-bass European club riffs pound through the thin walls of Kappa Kappa Zeta, WSU’s up-and-coming frat house. The smell of spilled beer and cheap cologne is pervasive here, on a Saturday night in August, where WSU’s finest are gathering to celebrate the beginning of the fall semester, regardless...
OPINION: Satire: New tech destroys privacy
JACOB HERSH, Evergreen opinion editor
May 27, 2020
When it comes to coronavirus, everything’s up in the air. Governments are scrambling to respond and strange solutions are being examined for even the slightest amount of feasibility. Maybe it’s OK to drink bleach? You don’t know, and neither do I, because this pandemic has thrown everything we...
OPINION: Satire: The Rat King Rises
JACOB HERSH, Evergreen Columnist
April 13, 2020
Everyone’s talking about it. It’s on the tip of everyone’s tongue. It’s contagious, it’s recent and it seems to have everyone’s attention. Now, you’d think I’m referencing the coronavirus, but it’s actually something a lot more sinister, with significantly more mullets. That’s right...
SATIRE: The dead walk
JACOB HERSH, Evergreen columnist
March 9, 2020
Does the recent coronavirus outbreak have anything to do with the mysterious surge of violent crimes in the Whitman County area that some claim is the result of a “zombie infection”? No, is the resounding answer from the state’s health officials. “There’s no such thing as a zombie ou...
One female and one male older than 80 years old died from COVID-19, which marks 12 deaths in the county. Eighteen individuals tested positive for COVID-19,...
